Today’s reflection comes from WENDY CALLEAR
She wrote this song based on Psalm 139 and sings it here:
I thought I’d like to tell you a bit about what Psalm 139 means to me.
When I first read it, I found it quite scary: God is there, watching me, wherever I go. And worse, much worse, God is listening to my every thought, good and bad! Not only does he see, hear and feel everything I see, hear and feel, he does it before it’s even happened! I can’t run; there’s no hiding place! He even saw my features before I was born. He could see me in that secret, safe, private place in my mother’s womb. What an invasion of the ultimate privacy! The indignation!
Later, I asked the question: if God knows all this in advance, why doesn’t he make sure I don’t make mistakes? Why does he let me do silly, hurtful, even harmful things? Why does he let any of the crazy and even wicked things happen in the World? No, I wasn’t at all comfortable with this wretched Psalm!
Then, around 20 years ago – and I know it was around then because that’s when I wrote this song – I saw the Psalm in a completely new light: God loves me so much, he’s there, watching over me the whole time, just like a loving parent watches over a young child.
I started not to see him as a judgemental man with long hair, wearing a white robe but more as an entity, a spirit, intensely loving and forgiving; a spirit that is not just beside me but is a part of me, an integral part of my very being, right from the moment I was conceived. Yes, he (for want of a better pronoun) thinks and feels with me because he is a part of me.
He knows my failings before they are revealed to others and to me. He isn’t going to stop me from making mistakes because he isn’t a puppet-master, pulling my strings. He’s there to give me strength and wisdom to try to work things out for myself. So why would I want to run and hide from him? I now rejoice that he’s with me wherever I go, whether it be near or far, up high or down low, in the light or in the dark. He’s my constant travel-companion through Life.
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